When your partner is suffering from anxiety it can have an impact on you and your relationship. Living with someone who suffers from anxiety can be challenging and the process takes time and patience.

You may be unfamiliar with the symptoms of anxiety but notice your partner is acting differently. It’s common to feel hopeless and frustrated in not knowing how to support your partner.

Here are 7 important ways to help your partner who is suffering from anxiety

Know the warning signs of Anxiety: Anxiety looks different for different people, so you want to familiarize yourself with your partner’s symptoms. You want to be able to recognize the onset of the symptoms and encourage professional help as soon as possible. You may be the first to notice behavior changes in your partner and these insights can be valuable during treatment.

Validate Their Experience: It’s important not to minimize your partner’s experience or pain in their struggle with anxiety. Anxious people will sense if you think their fears are irrational or silly. Try not to make statements such as; “you shouldn’t feel that way,” or “don’t think about it.” Instead, you want to say; I can see you’re very upset, or “that must be so painful for you.” Validating is a critical communication tool and shows you accept and support your partner.

Don’t be judgmental: There is a sense of shame attached to having anxiety, which can prevent your partner from seeking help for a treatable illness. Remind them that anxiety is a common problem, and they shouldn’t be ashamed of it. We want to remind our partner that we all have issues, but it’s critical to learn how to manage them.

Do a few things each day to make their life easier:  Responsibilities that you consider normal everyday tasks may feel overwhelming to your partner. Taking over some of your partner’s responsibilities can be very helpful during this time. You want to let them know that you understand and don’t blame them if they cannot meet certain tasks and obligations during this difficult period.

Encourage Treatment: Avoid trying to help on your own and encourage your partner to seek help. Ask your partner if they want you to participate in their treatment. Don’t feel that you have to have all the answers. Just offering a hug and letting them know “we will get through this together” can be comforting to your partner. Listen to your partner’s concerns before offering any solutions. You want to just listen and try not to fix it. Make them feel safe and understood.

Create a supportive environment: Encourage your partner to talk about the way they are feeling, thinking or acting and listen empathically. Making sure they are taking care of their physical needs and reminding them to take their medication is helpful. Ask your partner what would they like to experience and what would be most helpful to them. Emphasizing that it is not their fault and sharing how much you love them is an important way to support your partner.

Make Self Care a Priority : Self care is extremely important. You need to take care of yourself so you can be strong enough for your partner when they need you. Exercise, mediate and find a good friend outside of your relationship you can talk and vent to. This will also encourage your partner to find support outside of your relationship which will help them in the long run.

Having a partner who’s struggling with anxiety can become stressful for you and your relationship. Team up with your partner to tackle anxiety rather than allowing it to drive your relationship apart. Try your best not to take it personally. It’s important to take care of yourself and seek out your own supports.

The good news is anxiety is very treatable. A combination of medication and talk therapy can help your partner feel better and return to their normal level of functioning.

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If you’re struggling in your relationship, call 917-273-8836 or contact us for a complimentary consultation to learn more about couples and marriage counseling in NYC and how we can help you.