As everyone has probably realized, Valentine’s Day is coming soon.  Stores are packed with candies, jewelry, flowers and cards.  Seeing all those red and pink hearts can make a single guy or gal tremble in their shoes.  Feelings of loneliness and self-doubt can start to rise.

Instead of feeling lonely and sad, enjoy being single.  Focus on the fact that love doesn’t just belong to couples, it belongs to everyone. You’re fabulous and single and you can do anything!

Here are a few suggestions on how to move beyond feeling lonely or sad on Valentine’s Day:

1.)    Do not define yourself by your relationship status.  Being in a relationship does not create your identity – that’s all up to you.

2.)    Accept your feelings.  If you’re feeling depressed, sad, or lonely accept it.  It’s completely natural to have these feelings when everyone seems to be paired off into couples and you feel alone.

3.)    Remember that Valentine’s Day is a commercial holiday.  It’s about selling flowers, candy, and singing telegrams.

4.)    Ask yourself: do you want to be in a relationship?  If so, put yourself back on the dating market.  Join a singles group, go on a blind date, or ask someone you’re attracted to out on date.  Get out there and meet new people.

5.)    Pamper yourself.  Plan a day just for you.  Go to the spa, open a bottle of wine, or take a bubble bath.  Do something that you want, just because you enjoy it.  Valentine’s Day is the day of love – so show yourself some!

So tell me, how do you plan to spend Valentine’s Day?

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To Greater Intimacy,

Rachel Moheban-Wachtel, LCSW