Couples Substance Use Recovery NYC: How to Avoid Holiday Rationalization & Relapse
If you are like most couples navigating the holidays, you know that this time of year ushers in a seasonal set of stressors that can tax your patience, finances, and goodwill. If you are a couple navigating substance use recovery during the holidays, you know that the holidays can trigger troubling thoughts and decisions that land you back in a cycle of substance misuse and relationship distress.
But you don’t have to go down that road again. To keep you and your partner safe and on the course of recovery, it is essential to be mindful. Be prepared to set firm boundaries and remain well supported by an experienced couples substance use recovery counselor.
Couples Substance Use Recovery NYC: What to Look Out For
The activity and excitement of the holidays are contagious. There is nothing wrong with looking forward to gathering, gift-giving, and tradition. Still, it is vital that you look closely at what triggers substance use and impacts your relationship negatively.
Moreover, do your best to be honest with yourself and each other. Don’t allow the expectations of the season to convince you that you can relax the thought patterns and limits that keep you safe and connected.
For example, family gatherings are a delight for some and drudgery for others. Often, they are stressful, toxic, or simply unpleasant. Acknowledge what’s true for you and the emotional toll. Be aware that your family dynamics may still inspire a desire to use or justify substance use.
Holiday memories or traditions can also trigger grief, anger, anxiety, or depression. Don’t dismiss those emotions or moods in the name of holiday magic. Paying attention to your internal state is crucial for staying ahead of relapse or use-related relationship trouble.
Couples Substance Use Recovery NYC: How to Take Care of Each Other
There are several things you can do to prevent problematic negativity, vulnerability, or surrender to substance use.
To maintain your connection to support and your recovery tools, make a plan to stay connected to people you trust and understand your situation. In other words, use the tech and platforms that serve you. Keep appointments with your therapist in person or via telehealth. Set times with your support group. Check-in with loved ones who get it. As a couple, do what it takes to ensure you have people in your corner all season long, wherever you are.
To ease anxiety and cope with triggers, don’t dismiss the importance of the mind-body connection. It might serve you and your relationship well to plot routine gym, meditation, or yoga sessions together throughout the holidays. Intentionally relaxing and remaining aware of ways to release tension as a team can help you combat substance use and build closeness simultaneously.
Along the same lines, try to maintain consistency during the season. Coordinate your calendars, keep date nights, and resist the urge to forgo regular meetings with counselors or other supportive recovery helpers. This can alleviate the desire for substances as a calming remedy to disrupted schedules that can lead to irritability, reactivity, and misunderstanding.
Alcohol and other substances are everywhere at holiday gatherings, even given as gifts. Protect yourselves by putting your recovery and relationship first. First, agree to keep your home free of substances. It’s okay to avoid any gatherings that will tempt you. For those events, you feel obligated to attend, agree to bring your own non-alcoholic options. Even bringing an accountability couple or friend with you can help you stay safe and in control.
Couples Substance Use Recovery NYC: Who to Lean On for Support
Substance use counseling is key for recovering couples year-round. However, the holiday season brings a special emphasis on the “shoulds” that can lead to relapse (We should be happy, we should go holiday gatherings, We should be able to participate/party like our friends).
To help you avoid trouble, lean into the support and expertise of an experienced couples substance use counselor. They can help you focus on your recovery goals and find ways to buffer your relationship throughout all the well-meaning wintertime merriment.
The Relationship Suite
Finally, we are here to help you overcome unhealthy behaviors all year round, acquire optimal coping skills, and work toward the life you want all year long. To schedule a free, 20-minute consultation, please reach out.
As therapists, we have worked with substance use in recovery, the partners of substance users, and couples. We believe it is essential to handle the situation and its consequences with empathy, acceptance, and patience. With hard work, forgiveness, and the right kind of support and counseling, many couples can heal their relationship and create a new and healthier relationship.
This takes a lot of time, patience, and persistence, but a new level of trust and intimacy can happen. Please learn more about our Couples and Substance Use Recovery counseling services for help.
If you’re looking for couples counseling for substance use, call 917-273-8836 or email us. We are currently providing Online/Virtual Video Counseling to our clients with HIPAA-based platforms.
We are a group of skilled therapists specializing in individual and couples counseling. Since Covid, we have been working with couples via Online Counseling in New York, and New York City including Manhattan, Queens, Brooklyn, Bronx, Staten Island, Westchester, Long Island, Roslyn, Port Washington, Manhasset, South Hampton, East Hampton, and Montauk. To schedule a complimentary consultation, click HERE.
We also provide Virtual Counseling in New Jersey, Hoboken, Jersey City, Princeton, Chatham, Morris, Westfield, Union, Bergen County, Colts Neck, and Tenafly. Schedule a complimentary consultation by clicking HERE.
