Frank Sinatra definitely had the right idea when he sang “Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again..”
Easier said than done though.
Especially when you feel as though your whole life is falling apart and you have to get out there and start dating again.
This may sound dramatic but it is not an unrealistic feeling as those who have experienced, or those who are in the midst of experiencing the breakup of their marriage or long-term relationship, could vouch for.
Couples tend to build their lives around each other and when the relationship ends, so do feelings of security and certainty about the future.
Accept that you need to grieve. Going through the grieving process is essential and completely normal. Allow yourself to mourn for a healthy amount of time before moving on with your life.
You don’t want to blame yourself for the breakup but learn the important lessons. Here are questions you need to examine and ask yourself as part of getting over the breakup:
- How did I contribute to the problems of the relationship?
- Do I tend to choose the wrong person?
- What issues do I need to work on to have a healthier relationship?
- Do I have realistic expectations in a relationship?
- Do I handle conflict in a constructive way?
As you work through your grieving process, rediscover who you are as an individual and figure out what kind of person you want to attract into your life. Once you develop a stronger sense of self and feel ready, get a plan in place to find love again.
If you are having difficulty getting over a breakup, we are a group of skilled therapists specializing in relationship and divorce counseling. Since Covid started we have been working with couples providing Online Couples Counseling in New York, New York City, Scarsdale, East Hampton, Buffalo, Albany, New Jersey, Hoboken, Jersey City, Princeton, Chatham, Morris, Westfield, Union, Bergen County, Millburn, Montgomery, Somerset, Colts Neck, Tenafly, Alpine, Ridgewood, Englewood, Englewood Cliffs, Franklin Lakes, Hillsdale, Glen Rock, Montvale, Mahwah, Paramus, Park Ridge, Ramapo, Westwood, Glen Ridge, Rumson, Red Bank, Wayne, Little Falls, Hillsborough, Watchung, Summit, Springfield, Livingston, Montclair, Maplewood, Morristown, Berkeley Heights, Warren, Basking Ridge and Millstone. Schedule a complimentary consultation by clicking HERE.
